Travel for the Soul

because without seeing over your self built fence how do you know how green your own grass grows

Mind, body and soul are important to me and all need attention from yourself to feel balanced and centred. Travel is definitely food for the soul in so many ways. For some travel can be just to head to warmer climate and be surrounded by familiarity. Although I personally wouldn’t call that travelling for the soul some times a change is as good as a break. I’m certainly not snobby about travel which I feel can be common in seasoned traveller circles.

The most cringe worthy for me being a gap year back packer who has stayed in hostels around Australia feeling superior to a family that go to Florida every year. They are both sides of the same coin, both knowing what to expect and unlikely to experience cultural diversity. This is where I see true travel or the part that fills your soul. Experiencing other ways of doing things can only be a positive for personal growth. Being exposed to new cuisine, religions, social graces and fashion all adds to you as a person.

Traveling in and around different cultures has never been more important in a world that is polarising itself day by day. People living in echo-chambers surrounding them self with other opinions that never challenge their own and worse still being offended when any new idea is presented to them. Travel immerses you in alternative ways of living that work for them. Even if the travel only affirms opinions you previously held it has been worth it, because without seeing over your self built fence how do you know how green your own grass grows.

Some advice I would give to the least adventurous out there with regards travel is to always seek the genuine local experience. I’m not saying spend all day every day with your family living like a local but even if it’s an afternoon searching for a local restaurant that wasn’t suggested at your hotel or some markets you passed in the hire car from the airport. Breath it in and remember the experience the people you are mixing with on this occasion are probably never going to get the opportunity to do this in your world.

For me my next travel will be to the Philippines, Cebu island to be exact which prior to booking I had no knowledge of what so ever. The location was picked for me in one way or another but it seems as if it was meant to be as I have had a bucket list adventure to swim with Whale Sharks my whole life, where this is possible in Cebu. My girlfriend and I plan to get a place on the island for a month, she is using the time to work and me…… well I’m not sure. I do know I am now fixed on my years goal I have mentioned in previous blogs, so I will use this time to formulate the strategy on achieving the goal.

For some reason I am reluctant to write what my goal is, I have no idea why that reluctance is within me. It’s not like anyone could jump in my brain and take it nor may they wish to. Maybe its the feeling of putting myself out there on a creative pursuit that has been a long time dream but I have never brought to reality. It could be just insecurities of failure that lie within us all, I am going to have a closer look at myself on why I am so coy around this.

But anyway the ramblings of today are certainly based on happy thoughts, travel is good for you soul, sometimes letting others pick the destination may enhance your own journey and just having the intention of setting a goal with time and effort can create one.

Letting Go

The main point of letting go is the acceptance that who or whatever you are choosing to leave will no longer be part of your future

Most people struggle with letting go because they confuse it with throwing away. Letting go is a conscious thought out process where it a person has decided to remove someone or something from their life. This can take time and is not always a clean break but it doesn’t need to be. The main point of letting go is the acceptance that who or whatever you are choosing to leave will no longer be part of your future.

Throwing away on the other hand is an emotional decision that often is made in haste. Throwing away a person from your life is selling your self short as you do not give your brain sufficient time to deal with the emotions needed to move on.

We do both throughout our lives but trust me you need to recognise the difference between them. Not fully letting go will leave you in an emotional limbo where you are treading water between your future and your past. Anyone who has been through breakups can tell you what loss feels like. But if you are caught in a breaking up making up cycle even though you know the relationship doesn’t make you happy, you are not letting go.

Breaking up can be one of the hardest things to deal with as though it is a psychological input a physical pain can be felt. This is where how you broke up comes into effect. If you have thrown away that person in anger and not dealt with the breakup and let go you will be back together repeating the same cycles in no time at all.

Trust me I have experience in just about every type of break up and non are fun but being caught in a pain cycle is the least fun. When I have let go correctly although pain is still felt ultimately you know you are doing the right thing. Which in turn allows you to accept where you are in life and move on.

Time and Distance

When two people are so in tune with one another that time ceases to exist and distance separates this bond the two people can feel energy loss

This morning I have been thinking a lot on time and distance. How much they affect us and the relationships we hold. Time considered by some to be a concept that and that when most describe time they are actually describing decay. For instance we may say 8 years have passed but that is relative to our planet and describes the natural functions that have occurred on this planet. The first thing that comes to mind is our personal age, but are we just describe our point of decay?

Anyway cleverer people than me have written some interesting stuff on this if you wanted to check it out I would suggest Biocentrism by Bob Berman and Robert Lanza.

We need some way of describing what we perceive as time so I guess what we have works. But it got me thinking on why it goes so quick in moments when you are truly yourself and happy and seems so long when you’re unsettled and unhappy. This is amplified in relationships which almost seems cruel don’t you think? Would we not switch the paradox if we could?

A person close to me describes a lot of this with energies we have, she says that when two people’s energies align the time almost doesn’t exist as you are being your true self. I like her explanation as it can fit into the science theory associated with time. I like when spirituality and science cross over something about this for me is when we get closest to understanding the human condition.

I think this may be the reason distance between two people in relationships can be tricky. When two people are so in tune with one another that time ceases to exist and distance separates this bond the two people can feel energy loss. This is how I describe it of course but some would simply say they are missing one another. I don’t think that is an accurate assessment however because if it was simply missing one another why can other emotions appear such as resentment, anger and insecurities. The theory I have been considering today is in fact these feelings are your body telling you that energy is missing a counterpart.

How to close the distance and supply the energy that person you are away from is something I’m still working on. Any suggestions are welcome on this, finding a way to close that gap that opens would make the world a happier place.

Distance and time combined can make you feel alone and question yourself as a person. This to me is the most interesting part as all of these things are our own emotions and thoughts, we control them. So why do we let ourselves give into time and distance, a lot will be in our self-conscious and beyond immediate control. But I personally am going to try some brain exercises the next time a negative emotion arrives in my body where I sit reflect on that it is me giving myself this thought and not the distance or the time.

Maybe most negative emotions can be conquered by keeping hold of the knowledge that we make ourselves sad and we create anger. Outside inputs only influence our decision-making but how we interpret this input can only rest on our shoulders. I speak as if I am some zen master but in reality this is something I am working on as part of a continuous improvement ethos.

 

 

Goal Setting

At the moment life growth is the most important part of this goal, but what that looks like has still to materialise. And thats ok!

Setting goals is very is so January right?

Well for most that’s all it seems to be, I am someone who has always set goals of sorts. Normally they are achievable smaller goals such as a certain amount of gym activity to be reached such as a bench press to be reached or a run time. Or something I kept up with last year of listening to one new album every week to keep me down with the kids, I would actually recommend this as the constant influx of new stimulation certainly had my brain firing.

But this year I want to think bigger, having still yet to quite fully sculpt the idea out of the lump of clay  laid out. The important thing with this analogy is I have the lump of clay, I want a goal of bigger proportion than usual. At the moment life growth is the most important part of this goal, but what that looks like has still to materialise. And that’s ok! Putting pressure or a timescale on something so important could actually hinder this.

I have always been an ideas guy, spouting thoughts to anyone who will listen so turning this potential energy into kinetic energy is the next step. Using the creative side of my brain is important I know this much, in fact this blog is part of my step towards helping increase my creative activity.

So what are you doing together yourself in 2018?

I have set big goals for myself in the past and achieved them so I do have some advice:

  • Split your big goal into smaller achievable chunks
  • Give yourself timescales for each chunk
  • Then work your arse off to complete each one
  • Always keep in mind the long-term Goal

If you miss a target don’t worry as if you are taking small steps it means you are still moving.  An example I can give is when I wanted to pass my International Safety Diploma (Bachelors Equivalent) while still working full-time in a diplomatic role. To look at this as one complete task would be over whelming.  So I broke what it would take to do this and asked myself how can I squeeze the time required into my life. The smallest goal each day would be to fit in 1 hours reading or study, followed by a monthly goal of 25 days within the month of that 1 hour and my 6 month goal would be to finish a module of the study. Before I knew it 2 years had passed and I had graduated, the feeling of goal setting and achieving can not be understated.

Motivation is of course the wind in the sail of any achievement and if you have committed to a goal you are already en route to your destination. How do you stay in the same mind-set and keep the same levels of motivation throughout. I personally have some techniques depending on my goal, I always find it motivating to listen to motivated people. I would have to suggest a couple of podcasts at this point where I draw a lot of motivation from. If my goal is business or career related I find listening to the James Altucher Podcast a godsend due to his array of guests who give so many insights on their versions of success. As I have been wanting to flex my creative muscles of late I have been listening to Adam Buxton who interviews a wide range of performers from authors to actors.

You may know the two people I have mentioned but if you don’t I urge you to take a look I fail to see how these could not add value you to your life. This word value is also very important when achieving goals, spending time on things that don’t add value will affect when and if you achieve those goals. This doesn’t mean drop all the things like your favourite TV show or stop going to support your favourite team. If these are how you recharge you batteries then these are adding value to your life and ultimately your goal. But if you look back on your last two weeks and all of your free time has been spent channel surfing on your sofa, maybe you should ask yourself what value this had added.

The most popular goal I hear being spoke of in January is of course weight loss or fitness based. The same rules apply in regards techniques in my opinion small achievable chunks that lead to your goal. For me fitness has always been an important part of my weekly routine so my fitness goals are less about weight loss more about an activity or achievement. What I will say on weight loss which seems to be rarely spoke about is weight is lost in the kitchen not the gym. Sort your diet out and the weight will fall off, if you are looking for good fat loss results I would take a look at the No Sugar No Grain lifestyle championed by Vinnie Tortorich. If ever I want to lose any pounds I use this lifestyle as it isn’t to restrictive and it WORKS.

I am always trying to improve physically and mentally as a person so if you have any suggestions on goal setting or motivation please get in touch on here or via social media via @siratkinson.

Continuous Improvement in Your 30’s

I didn’t however think I would be childless, divorced and still deciding on which country to live. Some of you may read that last sentence with dread or probably don’t relate because you are in fact married parents settled in your country of choice.

This is my first blog ever wrote in Perth Western Australia visiting my brother reflecting on 2017, the good and the bad. I decided to write a blog for Three reasons:

  • As part of a personal 2018 push to spend more time on creative outputs
  • I wish to continually improve as a person, so hopefully I will read some of my own advice and use it for once.
  • I have found that over the years my friends from all around the globe will use me for advice. Hopefully this means I can be of some use to you.

Side note – I feel I have a good grasp on the world but not always a perfect grasp on the english language. I mean it is my mother tongue and I am a native so all my blog should be more than legible but I am also northern and majored in International Safety not English Literature.

So Lets Begin……..

Wow 34 how did this happen, the obvious things I saw creep up on me I suppose the move from clubs to pubs and more recently houses for socialising, ear hair and the constant wedding invitation reply saga. I didn’t however think I would be childless, divorced and still deciding on which country to live. Some of you may read that last sentence with dread or probably don’t relate because you are in fact married parents settled in your country of choice.

Life has a strange way of keeping you on your toes, just when you thought that’s me settled BOOM drastic changes happen. Now I have never been someone who fears change in actual fact I revel in it in most cases. My career path reads something like wannabe Footballer, Student, Fireman, Diplomat, Business Owner to me currently working in TV advising journalists on safety. It’s generally the changes outside of our control which cause anxiety or stress. For me this has been things like break ups, fraud on my business, cheese (odd phobia to have I know) or falling short.

So being in control of your own destiny is one the keys to happiness, but what does that mean?

Mind, Body and Soul are three words that are used together for a reason.

Educate yourself, if that means reading a book or watching a documentary just make sure you are absorbing information.

Keep fit and healthy, it has been long since proven that exercise has positive side effects. Keeping the weight off will not only make you more confident it will also keep you away from the doctors so it’s a no brainer.

Soul is a trickier nut to crack due to its subjectivity, for me this could be anything from a game of football to writing a poem. The important part being due something, anything.

Own your own problems victim-hood serves no one but the oppressor, life isn’t fair at times accept that. Most of us were not born into money or with IQ’s of 200 but that doesn’t mean you can’t win at life. You may need to worker harder than some to achieve the same outcome so just accept that and get on with it.

Be part of your community, this can be anything from volunteering to supporting a sports team. Most differences between people become meaningless when you see someone as an equal and not an outsider.  I am a firm believer that all life is connected and humans are part of the environment not the owners of it. Drop your prejudices you will find the energy it saves can be used for greater things that bring you happiness.

Surround yourself with positive people, this for me is something that I had to learn and in fact I’m still learning. Negativity is seriously a weight around the neck that plays to our worse traits such as jealousy, anger, narcissism and self loathing. Become a positive person that energy you produce will serve you well short and long-term.

Accept you will be wrong and learn from it, non of us want to be wrong in fact it hurts little when we are. If you do see an error in your ways accept your behaviour, language or actions need to change in order to improve as a person.

Dont place yourself in an echo chamber, if you don’t like a view or an opinion listen to it and don’t hide from it. It’s ok to disagree with someones views but that I promise you that if you do not shelter yourself from them views you will learn something.

The above ramblings are what came to mind when I decided I wanted to write a blog and have certainly worked on ensuring I am a positive happy person. I plan in future to talk about other more specific subjects that I have opinions on which is vastly ranged. I literally have interests in everything from boxing to impressionism so can’t see me being short on thoughts.

If you wish to contact please feel free or give me a follow on social media using @siratkinson